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Lin
Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 520
Location: Gt Clacton
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 Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 9:22 pm Post subject: How to Bath a Cat |
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Found this ,wish I had found it years ago ,it would have saved me a few scratches.
Method 1
1. Thoroughly clean the toilet .
2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water ,and have both lids open .
3. Obtain the cat and soothe him as you make your way towards the bathroom. 
4. In one smooth movement ,put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lids so that he cannot escape).
CAUTION : Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge , as his paws will be reaching out for any flesh they can find .
5. Flush the toilet three or four times .This provides a 'Power Wash' and rinse which I have found to be effective .
6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The now clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.
 .....anyone want to know method 2 ???
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ivan burit
Joined: 26 Dec 2006
Posts: 1188
Location: live the life you love, love the life you lead, if that fails, buy a big Harley Davidson.
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| Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 10:03 pm Post subject: |
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Please miss - please miss,
tell us-
.....anyone want to know method 2 ???
lol.........x
_________________
In truth we seek,In truth we learn,In Tendering,We get neither.. |
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amenity
Joined: 22 Nov 2006
Posts: 775
Location: Dovercourt
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| Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 11:11 pm Post subject: |
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My daughter, who loves cats, when she was a child found a feral kitten that was very stunted in growth and remained tiny, but for all that was the most wild animal the world has ever seen. Once after running around the room at ceiling height for several minutes after I entered the room, I managed to grab it by holding it very firmly (it was supremely strong) with it's feet pointing away from me then opened the back door and threw it down to the bottom of the garden, I watched it land just to make sure it was ok but before I could shut the door in a flash it was back in the room going completely insane.
After several attempts worthy of a VC I left the room, lacerated but alive. |
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Lin
Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 520
Location: Gt Clacton
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| Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 8:32 am Post subject: |
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OK Ivan ..Method 2
1.
Know that the kitty has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalise on that by choosing the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than 4 foot square, we recommend that you get in the bathtub with the cat and shut the sliding glass shower door as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A beserk cat can shreda three ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift postitions).
2.
Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin off your body.Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high topped construction boots, a pair of steel meshed gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face mask and a long sleeved flack jacket.
3.
Use the element of surprise,Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to cary him to his supper dish(Cats will not notice your strange attire.They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule).
4.
Once you are in the bathroom, speed is essential to survival.In a single liquid motion , shut the bathroom door, step into the bath enclosure, slide the glass door shut,dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You now have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.
5.
Cats have no handles. Add to the fact that he now has soapy fur,and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time.When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy.He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off .(The world record for cats is three latherings,so don't expect too much).
6.
Next ,the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans are generally worn out at this point and the cat is getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now ,the cat is semi-permantly attatched to your right leg.
7.
You simply pop the plug out with your left foot, reach for your towel and wait.(Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing to do is to shake him loose and to encourage him towards your leg). After all the water has drained from the bath, it is a simple matter to reach down and dry the cat.
After a few days the catwill relax enough to be removed from your leg.He will have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.
You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defences and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least he now smells better.
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