| Archive for talkclacton.myfastforum.org A discussion group on local issues for residents of Tendring District |
| admin |
It's Loud & Clear....It's Loud & Clear.... |
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| ivan burit |
The header says loud and clear..........
It seems to me that what is unclear, is the fact that newly elected youth councillors are now above these such web pages.. It may be that have thrown their PC`s away though, so i must not comment too much about it........ |
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| amenity |
I was wondering along the same lines Ivan. 
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| Nikadi |
Just wondering what you're on about? What's loud and clear? Stephen's big head or Danny's ignorance? :p | ||
| amenity |
With qualities like that they are bound to get on.
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| ivan burit |
Just came up with an `alliance name for the lost pair..
STEPHANNY............. OH WELL, BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARDS...LOL.. |
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| Lin |
  Pass the crisps please....oh forgot ,please and sorry not in their vocabulary
Sorry but it all smacks of further self-promotion ,any bets on how many times we have to put up with their faces plastered across the Gazette pages in the next year ? Now why are they still leaders of the Tendring Youth Council ,which incidentaly is nothing to do with TDC ,I was under the impression that Tendring Youth Council was independant from politics....seems to me that they are run by the Tory Party ,two tory councillors ,their Mum and DC. |
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| ivan burit |
that they are run by the Tory Party ,two tory councillors ,their Mum and DC.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Seems to me that its all a "bonding thing" A bit like super glue.... looks good on paper, but think of that when you have got your bum stuck to a loo seat in a school prank.......... Not funny.........snigger.....honest....it wernt me guvner.....lol... All this and more from your lunch time reporter from the driest place in the country...Honest.....lol... |
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| Nikadi |
I now see why Stephen wanted me to stay on the YC, he once told me that if he were to be otherwise busy, he wanted a reliable person to lead the YC and that's why I'd been given the position that I had, when I asked about Danny he said he couldn't trust him to replace him. He's been planning this for a long time methinks.
Individually they are nice people (most of the time) but together it's like being in the war path... Danny is like a jealous little brother, he can't stand to be in Stephen's shadow, and Stephen is the typical smug eldest, everything has to be done his way. But I suppose that's one quality that's gotten him in the papers so many tmes. Unfortunately he doesn't believe in showing the younger members faces in the paper and prefers himself to be there... |
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| ivan burit |
OK, i wonder if we did a poll on just who knows the terrible two..
ask the public just what have the terrible two done of late.. ask the public what they look like... ask the public if and why they voted for them.. ask the public how much faith they have in them...... So many questions...... So little action............ PS, welcome back Nikadi |
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| Lin |
I know what they look like as they are splattered all over the papers every week .
Anyone see the Anglia news last night reporting on BPC ???? guess who I saw practically pushing the Pm to one side whilst trying to get on camera ,when the PM (oooh sorry EX PM) visited a few years ago ????/.....yup mr pass the crisps.....
Say no more......put it down to him being so vunerable and at such a delicate stage of development ...we must not upset mr (or should I say master)
Forgot to say hi to Nikadi ,read your link to HP site ...very interesting...Keep us OF's informed ,we are interested in what makes the youth tick.... 
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| amenity |
Lin said.
"Forgot to say hi to Nikadi ,read your link to HP site ...very interesting...Keep us OF's informed ,we are interested in what makes the youth tick.... " I do hope Lin, thats not an irish question, if so you should have asked the amazing duo
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| Lin |
Oh Amenity ,thats far to clever question to go over their heads... your'e not implying that my very faint Irish blood is coming out in me are you??(ok I admit it my maternal Gt Grandmother came from Cork)
Anyone got any suggestions for superhero names for the terrible twosome ???....... We could have Dan Dare the putter righter of all things brown and scarey ...sponsored by Walkers crisps...
And how about Captain" I've got a little List "Stephanie sponsored by Kodak film ...
after all we have Capt Invincible .....TaaDaah who drives his scootie round the town with his pants outside his troosers
Thats it My brains being deliberately stoopid so I had better control myself before I say anything sillier and upset the Yoof Council.. Sorry Nikadi but we dont include you in the Yoof group as you are far too sensible..... 
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| amenity |
Nikadi is definately not in the same bracket as the duo, just in case there was any doubt. | ||
| Lin |
No doubt at all Amenity ...in fact it's nice to have contact with a teenager without attitude. | ||
| ivan burit |
Taa-Daah.......
Who needs yoof wit altitude when you`ve got us.............. Capt. Invinceable and his merry band of super heros...(brings back memories of taa-dahh super ted) (have you seen my `aving a pop at` ecc / highways / tdc- about wheres my bike parking spaces.) altitude, who`s got altitude..? Oh no- no - no - NO - you dont need yoof to have altitude my dears, just ask the Capt...........lol........(ps, got a secret...i doo really like crisps..nice ones though, is that ok then..?.).............my wife worries abart me.... |
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| frankie |
i heard our friend danny got in trouble for wearing a pair of shorts and flip flops to a council meeting,i saw in the local paper too that he asked a question at a council meeting about obese children,did he declare an interest??? | ||
| Vicar |
I was unfortunate enough to be in a bar which was invaded by a gang of Hooray Henrys and the odd Henrietta late in the evening. They all had to talk loudly and at the same time in case the ordinary mortals didn't realise how important they were.
Unable to avoid the loud "conversations" it soon becaame apparent that they were in fact a gang of disgruntled local councillors and they were discussing the meeting they had just left. I loked round for the Boy Wonder and saw him with Big Brudder and Ma. The company was dominated by an alpha-male who wanted us all to know what a character he was by being louder than all the rest and using the F-word at least once in every sentence. I sat back and waited for the fireworks. Here I was in the presence of someone who had deleted a post from a board he moderated because the writer used an obscenity (actually it was the adjective "bitchy") now he found himself in a room where someone was repeatedly effing and blinding in front of his mother. Competition Time. What do you think he did or said? Answers to "Sweet F A competition" at the usual address. PS My evening was nicely rounded off by a little old lady who had watched the proceedings carefully. I wondered if she had been offended by what she had heard. I was wrong As I left she pointed at the gang at the bar and said to me, "You know who they are, don't you?" I said, "Yes" She said, They're a load of F****** W****** that's who they are." Made my night. |
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| amenity |
As an echo Vicar to your tale. I was in the planning office at Weeley three or so years ago and a very obnoxious large man came in and when he saw about five people queuing for service he became very irate and started banging the counter, generally behaving in an aggressive manner, eventually the woman serving came out and he let of a strip indicating he was in a hurry and finished of with "I am a f****** councillor".
This beast was ushered out of the room, everybody exchanging knowing glances. Age about fifty eight (now about 61 'ish) height about six feet. I wonder if this is your alpha male? |
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| Lin |
careful you don't hurt the poor little things delicate feelings ,remember how fragile they are at their tender stage of development .............
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| ivan burit |
Answers to "Sweet F A competition" at the usual address.
HA..HA..HA... I tell you what, as i represent the residents of the area where i live..(not, not an effing Cllr.)....i think it would be great fun going to watch our elected one cell`s performing....... I have heard that camera phones not only pick up voices very well, but pictures also............lol.............. Do you recon that if i went dressed as Captain Invinceable..ta..daah... i would be recognised............lol... |
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| mojo |
What I find rather worrying re the Vicars post is that they were discussing a meeting in front of the public in a very public place.
Doesn't bode well for confidentiality, does it? |
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| amenity |
mojo,
Perhaps it's all part of the new spirit of transparancy and openness 
Maybe they will stop refusing to answer difficult questions because of 'commercial sensitivity' |
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| Vicar |
My wife made the point that if a gang of 18-year-olds walked into a bar and behaved like that, they would have been asked to leave. Anyway. You've picked up on a point I omitted. There were comments like, "Did you see (named gentleman councillor)? He couldn't keep his eyes off (named lady councillor) , He was staring at her all night." Another was, "When I get home tonight I'm going to google her and get all I can on her. Then I'll sort things properly." All of this was delivered at full volume and couldn't be missed by anyone in the pub. I was impressed by the sheer arrogance of people who are so important that they didn't feel the need to look over their shoulders to see who might be listening. In Victorian times the gentry used to speak in French in front of the servants to avoid problems like this. You don't get the saame quality of toff as you used to. Although I am not a lover of the Conservatives I was appalled at the way an unholy alliance was suddenly formed to fly in the face of accepted practice and stitch them up to keep them away from power. More so as my chosen "Independant" candidate is one of the ABC gang However now I have seen the behaviour of some of the councillors they are protecting us from I am beginning to think it was notsuch a bad thing after all. |
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| Lin |
And ,how many are in it just for the self promotion ??.In the ward where I live we have two councillors.One of them being a Conservative ,the other is Labour and Co-Op.
In the run up to the elections ,we didn't even clap eyes on the chappie who was a Con.Just a leaflet through the door claiming all he was going to do....what have we heard from him since getting his position of power ?.....diddly squit ,thats it ,zilch ,nothing. The other chap WALKED his ward ,knocked on doors ,spoke to the locals ,asked them what they wanted and has quietly gone about his business and IS sorting out the problems ,keeps us up to date with whats going on and we DON'T see his face plastered across the papers with stupid claims and silly stunts. Now I don't belong to any particular party and no-one could ever say I was pro Labour or Con . I just find it strange how one of our councillors seems to be missing...... Bet he was in the pub too........ Do these stupid people not realise that the public know who they are ,they make the mistake of having their mugs splattered all over the local rag and then think they can sit in a PUBLIC bar ,slagging off people ,swearing and airing what should be their PRIVATE veiws on other folk who are not there to defend themselves .....do they not think we know who they are ....shame on them ...they should remember they are PUBLIC servants elected by us and should be held reponsible for their actions....decent human beings and citizens ....think not!!!!
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| Nikadi |
Haha, hello again I suppose =D Nice to know I'm not in the same category as our 'friends' on one too many councils...
A little while ago I panicked whilst in Colchester for a night out thinking I'd seen Stephanny, then I realised that he never goes anywhere without his moether a few foot behind -_- You'd think at 20-something he'd be dying to leave home and have a bit of independance hm? I dislike 'politicians' very much. |
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| pepsi |
Perhaps the saddest thing is that because of the behaviour of so many "politicians", the people who genuinely believe in the old fashioned principles of running for councillor in order to serve their community and help improve the place get ignored or lumped with the large number of bad apples in the barrel. | ||
| amenity |
I must admit pepsi, it is saddening to see politics in such disrepute, can't ever remember when so much cynical distrust existed, maybe it's a function of awareness? |
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| Lin |
Could it be that we are all able to hold them to account nowdays with the advancing technology available ,after all 10 years ago we would not be communicating via the internet so would have been oblivious to their faults and gossip in public places ?.
We used to play a game in our house on the day the local paper came out ,it was called Spot the Pointer ,where we had to guess how many people were pictured in the paper pointing at various things that had disgruntled them. Now we have a new game Spot The Councillor Anyone noticed that hardly a week goes by without seeing our two junior 'members' (oh am I allowed to use that word as I know another meaning for it which relates to a certain part of the anatomy  )in full colour (please could the paper tone down the red shade I need sunglasses to look at ...Tah Dah ...Crisp Man ).
Not missed a week since attaining their post of power. I may have to stop buying the local rag as it has begun to give me Baaad dreams....
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| Vicar |
I don't need to look any farther than the Gazette for a word to describe them. The paper has habitually called them "fledgling councillors", as in something like "Fledgling councillors reject free computers" (I would have paid good money to hear what some of the older councillors said as they felt obliged to follow suit). "What a cracking idea these new lads have come up with. We'll save the council thousands. Can't wait to see what they do next". (Shouts downstairs) "Parker. Load the Purdeys and put them in the boot. Then bring the Bentley round to the front. We're going out".
Anyway, my dictionary defines fledgling as: 1 A young bird which has only just developed flight feathers and not yet left the nest. (How apt) 2 One who is young and inexperienced. (Apter) Lin, may I hijack your "Spot the Pointer" and "Spotty Councillor" games? I would like to offer a modest prize to the first reader who spots a picture of someone pointing at the fledgling councillors. Wouldn't that make an excellent caption competition? |
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| Lin |
Go right ahead Vicar...
All we need to do is keep a lookout for a family day out somewhere ,where the Spotty Councillors think the photographer from the paper will appear to take some delightful picture of a kiddie having a fun time, then check the area for SC 's on the prowl for a photo opportunity , when they home in on the kiddie doing the best Lurker in the World impression then as you spot the certain SC creep up behind him and give him 'Bunny Ears' from behind ...just as he gets his photo taken for the following weeks paper.....
First one to achieve this in the paper gets a Drink from me and I will even go down on bended knees to do a 'Bill and Ted' "I am not worthy" |
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| Vicar |
Yoou sem to be suspiciously well-versed in the art of stalking. But there's no shame in that.
Does anyone have any idea of whether there might be a pram race in the Eastern Counties some time in the next few months? (He asked innocently) We could form a circle and point at the one that takes eight big geezers to start it rolling. Puberty, then GCSEs then inertia. What next? Where will it all end? |
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| ivan burit |
form a circle and point at the one that takes eight big geezers to start it rolling. ..........
.....GEEZER........my scrubby old dictionary say`s geezer is "old - eccentric man"... What i want to know is just how do they get it right............. Do they (the publishers) come and look at us first, before going to print..!! Answers on a post card please to... the old eccentrict men society, C/O the community resource centre, Brooklands gardens, Jaywick, CO15 2HA... in the top left hand corner mark it...for the attn.. of chief garden sketcher.. ~~~~~~~~~~~sorry, its a "in - joke"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
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| Lin |
My dictionary just says it's a 'a man' so I am afraid that the word geezer cannot be allocated to one so delicate of mind and body (sorry ,fits of laughter whilst typing this as I just had an awful mental image pop up ). 
' My Suggestion for an alternate name would have to be.....pupa....... an insect at the stage of development between larva and adult'  Tah Dah............I'm orf before anyone puts me back in the naughty corner .........
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| ivan burit |
Miss whiplasses daughter.......Oh lordy-lordy-lordy...Young Lin, i`ll let you know that its been known for some mad scooty blokes to grab miss whiplashes up and place them in a position as to spank them pert.(ish) behinds for being SO naughty......lol.. |
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| Vicar |
I think Lord Stephen has made himself look a little silly in this week's Gazette.
Looky here http://www.gazette-news.co.uk/dis...ouncillor_upset_by_ticket_fee.php The sheer nerve of the little people expecting him to pay for a jolly is beyond belief. That's not what he joined for. |
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| Lin |
I am a mole and I live in a hole ha ha ha ha
Darnation Vicar ,you beat me to it again ,saw the article and laughed myself orf my chair so am typing this from the floor. Pssst anyone want a freebie ticket ..... Why the hell they have to sit up there like Lords of the Manor Gawd only knows ,is it the posh loo's or the caviar or the fact that Stephanie (Mi mi)doesn't think his mug shot will get into the papers if he mixes with us 'commoners'who pay his expenses and subsidise his tickets ,no I tink they should pay full cost and thats that. Has he even got a regular job????????not some post that he gets via Mummys connections,Douglas should smack the back of Mimi's legs and tell him to stop throwing his toys out the pram every time he has to fund his own jollies. |
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| Vicar |
Oh dear! Oh dear! Oh dear! There are already 22 comments on the article and only 22 of them are critical of the Lord. One chap is even going to emigrate. I think that's a bit extreme
Wait until the article appears in the Gazette tomorrow and the electors of Rush Green ward discover what their councillor's priorities are. Incidentally his "little" brother polled 44 more votes than he did in the election. Is that what they call "proportional representation"? I don't know if either of them is employed but if not it does mean that there is no problem about getting a day off for this type of event, which must be a load off their minds. Personally I would worry about being represented by councillors with so little experience of the real world. |
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| Lin |
Well Vicar,I have just asked our local chappie (not Tory) if he is going and he has assured me that he will be standing in the burger and ice cream queues like the rest of us dear mortals.
I agree with you that our representatives should have experience ,that's LIFE EXPERIENCE ,to be able to represent us fully and I am afraid that Lord Mimi does not have this basic function. I am not against encouraging younger members into political life ,but would hate to have to talk to someone so young if I had a problem.Especially if their main priority in life is getting upset about having to spend £40 of his allowance and pocket money on a jolly. Good job the summer holidays are here or they would demand that the date be changed so they didn't have to miss a day off school.
My old Nan would have said the two of them would go to the opening of an envelope if the press were there
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| frankie |
i couldnt believe what i had seen, i thought there was some mistake so i actually phoned the gazette and asked them if the story was true and when they told me it was i couldnt stop laughing, have you seen todays paper? he is now saying that something completely different, i think he needs to get a proper job and start to live in the real world.
anyway lin how is my sequined leotard coming along for the pram race!!
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| Lin |
Oh Frankie !!! didn't you realise ,stuckinessex is sewing them on for you .
I've had a good idea  (shut up Ivan ,I can hear you sniggering at the back ).
What about taking my 9.99 plastic gazebo down the front ,popping it up and put up a sign saying VIP Marquee ,guide all the dignatories in it ,zip it up quick and the fast forum team can reclaim the prime positon marquee and eat the buffet whilst passing round the crisps ??????.
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| Vicar |
Thank God for a bit of old-fashioned anarchy.
I myself will not be paying to enter either the official or the unofficial VIP marquees. Instead I will be makig a donation of 11 new pence to my favourite charity, Clacton's Really Intensely Sarcastic People's Syndicate Rather than use a VIP toilet (my imagination is running riot at the facilities that might be provided) I shall continue to employ the time-honoured Clacton practice of finding an unoccupied shop doorway. For my meal I shall I shall visit Macdonalds and ask the chubby boy behind the counter (looks strangely familiar) to recommend something from their extensive menu. You can usually rely on them to know what they are talking about. They are highly trained. (At least they've got jobs!) All to be washed down with a flagon of cloudy scrumpy from Morrisons. I intend spending most of the afternoon standing outside the official VIP tent tugging my forelock at the various dignitaries as they gracefully enter and leave FORELOCK Ivan, FORELOCK! (Just an afterthought. Look at the entrance to the VIP tent, just past the scruffy vicar with his hands in his pockets, and try and spot what arrangements are in place to ensure that only the right sort of people get in. What would happen if an elderly lady was taken short and rushed the barricades, desperate to use the facilities she was subsidising in her council taxes. Would we see a picture in the local paper of our couoncillors pointing at her as she was dragged away?) Too much communion wine always brings out my inner leftie. Sorry. |
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| ivan burit |
I`m orf me rocker......is that chair or char....Look, just for nearly once in our lives, praps we can take little lordy - lordy mayzes to our hard old hearts and give him the benefit of doubt....Nah..s*d that, he`s a creep and we know it..........lol....even the most reverend in our poor unfortunate souls knows just that, you know him, of the shaking cassock.......... After deep thoughts...(and i dont mean lin in super tight lycra either) i / we, in the outposts of west clackers have come up with a plan, a secret plan at that, to take No.1 sons camper..(no not that sort of camp) and go and park it near to the life boat station on the night before..then...shush...we can sit and wait till the super stars in the skies start.... If we get fed up before hand, like the good vicar, we can go and blow respberries at the vips while taking photos of them to print in the papers.. It would be like the 20 most distressed vips on a day off in the sunshine... pass the crisps.........lol... anyold way...change of story....29 of us mad mods rode through town tonight (thursday) and we all saw our new fountain of yoof alive and kicking for all its worth...... I thought we all could have rode our untrustworthy steads through the sumptious trophs to cleanse not only our souls, but our scoots as well, but TDC had left its early warning systems up and running by leaving its worksite cage fencing still erect around its fountain feature that was gushing like a good-un......... I went back half an hour later in my most modest mode with my most expensive and daughter No.2 and the super gushing groundworks were gone.................lol..... OK, the corner beckons......... |
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| amenity |
This was so good here it is again 
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| Lin |
Brilliant ,Amenity I tink we shoud have a 'Post of the Week Award'
only trouble is Vicar would keep winning it.
I laughed till I nearly needed the VIP's loo..... Regards our Crisp Boy and Lordy Lordy he amazes me.....
It would appear that a certain gene pool could do with a little chlorine...
Watch out boys ....The Peasants are revolting..... |
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| ivan burit |
.......I always wanted to be a very pleasent plucker myself, but to be a revolting peasant without being a pleasent pheasent plucker is not very plucky indeed...
Try that then vicar after a snifter of communial wine....HA...... ++++++++++LOL++++++++++++++ |
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| Vicar |
OK Ivan. Bluffs called while you wait.
I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's son I'm only plucking pheasants 'till the pheasant plucker comes. Me husband is a keeper, he's a very busy man I try to understand him and I help him all I can, But sometimes in an evening when the light is growing dim I pluck the pheasants on my own, I'd rather pluck with him. I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's mate I'm only plucking pheasants 'cos the pheasant plucker's late ! I'm not good at plucking pheasants, and quite often I get stuck Though some pheasants find it pleasant I'd much rather pluck a duck. Now plucking geese is gorgeous, I can pluck a goose with ease But pheasant plucking's torture because they don't have any grease. I'm not a pheasant plucker, he has gone out on the tiles He only plucked one pheasant and I'm sitting here with piles ! You have to pluck them fresh, you know, When fresh they’re not unpleasant, I knew a man in Dunstable, could pluck a frozen pheasant. They say the village constable had pheasant plucking sessions With the vicar on a Sunday ‘tween the first and second lessons. (That was me.That was.) I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's mum I'm only plucking pheasants 'till the pheasant plucker's come. My good friend Godfrey's most adept, he's really got the knack He plucks a pheasant every night before he hits the sack. I like to give a helping hand, I gather up the feathers, It's really all our pheasant plucking keeps us pair together. I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's friend I'm only plucking pheasants as a means unto an end ! My husband's in the forest always banging with his gun If he could hear me half the time I'm sure that he would run, For there's fluff in all my crannies, there's feathers up my nose And I'm itching in the kitchen from my head down to my toes. I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's wife And when we pluck together it's a pheasant plucking life ! That's Sunday's sermon sorted, and I never said **** once |
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| ivan burit |
SPEACHLESS AGAIN FOR ONCE......HA..HA..HA..
################################################ Well done you pleasent plucker, for not saying F**k More so you are a vicar, and not printing lots of muck We need your daily sermons, some ending with a duck So try to please us daily, without earning you a buck Us heathen west clacton settlers, reputedly living in mess and muck, Where blessed this sunny morning, with teachings of wisdom and pluck... |
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| Nikadi |
I managed to get through that very long 'sermon' without slipping up! *go me!* (after the fifth or sixth or one hundreth time...)
Just thought I'd share :p It's damn funny thgouh, must say =D I've never heard the whole thing before, just the first bit. |
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| Lin |
Looks like the terrible twosome are going for gold this week.
I have spotted them twice in the paper, .Do I win the Golden sick bag prize ??????
How about a new name for the local rag.....Mayzes Pages springs to mind. I have a sneaky suspicion that one of them is going to pull a stunt at the Airshow....now which one will it be ??? who will they be using to gain further useless publicity???? any ideas ??? Wouldn't surprise me if one of them turns up with a Granny in tow claiming there are no facilities for the elderly.....Watch this space..first one to spot a blatent waste of column space wins the Spot the Talentless award. |
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| ivan burit |
The stephanny`s are getting on the Captains nerves too..
it is rumoured he thinks of them as a**e wipes, but i am unsure just what he means........... |
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| EssexGurl |
The airshow would be the perfect oppourtunity to get rid of them.......tie them to the front of some planes in the display and get the planes to drop them off out over the sea. |
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| Vicar |
Well really!!!! What else would they pull? But seriously (not really) I think you've sussed it there Lin. I heard there were going to be wing-walkers on one of the planes. Now, if we stand Stephen on one wing and Danny, (Oh Lord how I miss the old days of rhyming slang), on the other, I think we could pretty well guarantee them major coverage in the national press. As always I am prepared to sponsor the event and would encourage you all to do the same. May I suggest that the sum of 10p per nose-dive would raise thousands of pounds for worthy causes. |
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| Lin |
I tink we may have a small problem here with balancing the weight distribution ...hmmmmm ...let me tink ....how about putting master Howlett on the same wing as Lordy Lordy ...yup that should balance it out .....oh to hear them squeal like stuck piggies
What it must be like to be so young and popular
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| Nikadi |
I've always wondered this, but never have I been unlucky enough to experience it :p Y'know those signs that fly behind the planes, wouldn't it be entertaining if either half of Stephanny somehow managed to get tied to a cord of one. But then it'd have to be Stephan, as if it were the other boy then the plane wouldn't get off of the ground... |
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| amenity |
Mean as I am renowned to be I'll raise that to 50p. |
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| EssexGurl |
Well I will match your 50p and raise it to 60p
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| EssexGurl |
Has the latest story about Dumb, dumber and dumbest been removed from the EG website. I went to check the comments but couldnt find it....unless I am totally missing it. | ||
| Lin |
Oh I got all excited then,but went over to the Mayzes Pages and ,sorry to say ,they are still there.Aptly placed directly above the Melons story.
Mmmmmmm Melon and crisp sarnies ,luvverly. |
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| EssexGurl |
Could you cut and paste me a link please cos I am obviously going blind lol. | ||
| Nikadi |
I was searching for it too EssexGurl. It wasn't there for some of the day yesterday (I think) for some reason or another, but it's there now, for the world to see -_-
Has anyone read the Essex Standrad recently? Three articleson the Mayzes iit! But one of them is someone saying they hope they can do better. I'll try find it... |
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| Nikadi |
Councillors Reveal Their Wishlist
Two youthful councillors have outlined their own ambitious vision for the district. Stephen and Danny Mayzes (also known as 'Stephanny' to their fans), who represnt Clacton's Rush Green ward on Tendring Council, have devised a wish list - dubbed the People's Priorities (should be Stephanny's Priorities...). Free parking for all residents, employing a tourism and marketing specialist (WHY?! They'd only tell us to get rid of the chavs!) and cheaper leisure centre fees (can he ever think of somethig new?) are among the plans. "These (1) are not our ideas (bollocks) - it is what the people say, it is about putting the people first," Said Stephen. "These (2) might not be everybody's opinions but these (3) are very wide (he shouldn't talk about Danny like that) and open ideas that might help shape the district. "Lots of people don't like changes but we are not here for the next 20 years for things to stay the same." The pair, aged 23 and 19, have done their own consultation (as always.) to devise the plan. "The council gets criticised about not doing enough consultation so we have done our own," Stephen continued. "Only 50 per cent of the district want to vote (so that's what happened to the smart half!). We want to start engaging with people who do not feel they can have a say. We really feel for our community and that's why we are here and here to stay. (O_O)" David Lines, leader of the Tendring Council, praised the councillors for their approach but warned the ideas would have to be funded. He described a plan to give anyone who pays their council tax in full and upfront free parking as a populist move that would cost up to £1 million. "I don't want to be negative but I hope their other ideas have been given more thought and research than free parking," he said. (I love this guy! haha) Mr Lines added the council is carrying out its most extensive ever consultation on a vision for the district up to 2016 - the draft sustainable community strategy. He urged Stephen and Danny Mayzes and all residents to contribute to that process via tendringdc.gov.uk or at Tendring Council Offices.
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| EssexGurl |
I see it now lol....it definitely wasnt there earlier.....how odd
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| Vicar |
Nikkadi, that was very wicked of you to take what these (1) boys said and to ridicule it. Well done. They don't actually need any help to make themselves a laughing-stock but it was thoughtful of you to make the effort.
Mr Lines seems to have their measure too. As a lifetime student and exponent of sarcasm I think I detect more than a note of it in his comments. You said that their fans call them "Stephanny", in fact they are establishing a fan-base throughout the country. I regularly send details of their latest comic capers to friends and relatives all over the place and they always look forward to the next silly installment. I was trying to use the word "epis ode" there, but ifyou type it in without a space it gets changed to "smile". How strange. Incidentally I heard that the phrase, "Buy this photo" under each picture of the dynamic duo (dynamic uno?) will shortly be changed to, "Buy this photo or we will print it on the front page of every issue until you do"
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| Lin |
How about a Guess What They are Up to Next competition??
A few suggestions could be 1.Instigating a V.A.T exemption on crisps
2.Grabbing a reluctant Granny from the town centre and having a picture taken claiming the slopes on the seafront should have escalators to help the elderly up and down the slopes, all funded by the local tax payers. 3.A large scale media campaign(of course with a multitude of front page photos) to grease all the door frames in the Town Hall so councillors with over-inflated ego's can gently slide their enlarged heads through the doors. Over to the rest of you............. |
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| Vicar |
Can I play?
Things to do today. Agitate for a crisp allowance for all councillors. Suggest free fish and chips for anyone presenting a photograph of the cherubs cut from the Gazette (any issue) Press for free travel on public transport for all young people in Tendring. The cost of this will be met by money from somewhere or other. (Note to self: Call Gazette. Suggest picture of boys pointing at bus.) Arrange urgent provision of a number of toilet blocks dotted around the area for the use of councillors and their families. These will be easily identified as different from the peasant's conveniences as they will not have a shallow end and a deep end. Each will be guarded by any PCSO's who are not attending photocalls (Oi Gazette! Picture of boys pointing at PCSO. OK?) Funded by cuts from some budget or other. No probs. A council bye-law will be passed banning any criticism of councillors aged 23 or 19. Anyone in breach of this bye-law will be required to sit with one of the lads for ten minutes. Start a campaign to discourage the 4 million youngsters who jump of Clacton pier each week. (Note to self: Arrange for at least three members of Tendring Council to meet on the pier. Arrange for at least 2 PCSOs to be there with them. Arrange for a press photographer to attend. Get him to photograph the 3 councillors and 2 PCSOs looking at the sign which says "Don't jump".) On second thoughts, scrap this one it's patently ridiculous, I mean who in their right mind..........? Start campaign to have local paper renamed Clacton Mayzette. (Picture of one councillor reading newspaper and one looking at it). This idea is a goer! Start a Youth council message board for the exclusive use of TDC councillors. This would avoid the possibility of any views being expressed by all those "wrong-thinking" people who are not fit to be called citizens of Tendring. (You know who you are. Filth). URGENT. Frantically try to find some way to retain seats at the next election. Rumours state that the Labour party will be fielding two extremely strong candidates in the persons of a pair of hamsters called Reg and Ronnie who are expected to win by a landslide. Neither of them has a real job, but Ronnie has qualifications in running inside a wheel. IMPORTANT!!!Don't tell Mr Lines about any of our brill ideas. He's has a loud laugh. We don't like him. |
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| Lin |
LOL
I admit defeat......... Nice One Vicar
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| EssexGurl |
Your Vicarness I bow down before you to worship your greatness.....fan-bloody-tastic
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